It's like the war of the roses going on in my house- Jay-Z

I wasn’t raised to be a dog ass nigga. My mom wouldn’t let me be mean to anyone. And even though my dad has his faults like all of us, He never hit my mother. I’m just not that guy. But, there are times and situations when I want to lash out and pop people in their mouth. Mainly my woman. But I refuse to let myself become that guy. I do love her. And as I’m sitting here typing, she’s sitting next to me on the couch fresh off another argument, trying to fix the tv remote she broke mad at me. At times I wonder if she ever gets tired of going at it. I know I do. I have been here since the 1^st day she told me she was pregnant. I have bent over backwards trying my absolute best to please her. And still, she is combative and ready to go off at any moment. When we go at it, I try and put in my head that “she’s just pregnant”,
“it’ll be better when the baby comes”. SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIID! The way things go between she and I don’t know if I’m going to come home and the deadbolt is locked. I just don’t fucking understand how someone can see you putting forth the effort and the person on the receiving end can shit and piss all on that. During these last 9 months, I have done a lot of things that another woman could never get me to do. I haven’t got any side pussy either. Work, Home, Her. 9 months of that. I don’t have but one friend here and I’ve been to hang with him 3 times. For me that's a major accomplishment.

Now I’m not going to play the game where the story is one sided. I have my faults like all other men.  One major thing, I don’t like to be questioned. And she’s a “question-er”.  A lot of questions she may ask, I don’t have the answer to. And that’s a frustration point with me. Also, I don’t like the way she talks to me. It’s always “smart alek”, “matter of factly”, combative kind of speech. I HATE that shit. I be ready to pop her ass right in the mouth like my mom used to do me when I got beside myself. But I’m not that guy. I’d rather take it all in and clown you when it’s over. In relationships, people grow together and they learn each other. I been with her 2 fucking years and it’s like she ain’t learned shit about me though. When we talk, the feelings and views she has of me makes me think she really feel like I’m a “ain’t shit ass nigga”. Not a good feeling if you want to spent your life with someone. Not a good feeling if you’re less than a month away from having a kid.

I feel like at times we both play the “Blame Game”. She says it’s me. I say it’s her. Neither of us will admit wrong. I point out things that she may say or do that will make mad and I’m the one with the problem. She may point out some shit I did or said (or didn’t say) and I say she’s immature. It’s back and forth. And I’m so tired of it. I really want to get along and raise this seed of mine. That’s all I fucking want. Just to get along in a peaceful household. But I don’t know how to get along if she’s dead set on going against me. There is a weak harmony in our relationship. I say weak because it’s always something to disrupt that harmony. I AM NOT PERFECT. NOR IS SHE. But I think we need to realize that ain’t no fucking nobody in this world gonna have our backs like each other. I realize it, but with the arguments it puts doubt into my mind. ”. Not a good feeling if you want to spent your life with someone. Not a good feeling if you’re less than a month away from having a kid.

I’ll rap my lil post up now and go back to sitting here in silence. Everybody have a nice day(s).

Little Eric Green will  be here in 2 weeks. 

Getting there

        I’ve been taking things day to day. Because I’m becoming to notice that plans and planning don’t too much for me. I won’t say “don’t work’ but, they don’t work out how I plan them. So I’ll still plan things and just hope that they work out in my favor. My little son is almost ready to some out. He’s moving around like a mad man in a straight jacket. I always say it’s so cool but I don’t think she feels the same way. I can tell she’s ready to get this pregnancy over with. All the back rubs, feet rubs, and belly rubs can’t change that either. The other night she woke me up talking about she had heartburn and it was so bad that she started to have a hard time breathing. So my panicky self gets all ready to take her to the E.R. The funny thing is, I ran to get ready to go and I’m fresh, ready to go but I went and got her some too small pants to go out in. I gave her some pepto tablets and she was good. I’m happy she didn’t go though, because I didn’t want to see NO parts of that E.R. copay.

   I am really anxious about the baby still. Not a bad type of anxious, but the good kind of anxious. Like anticipation of your 1^st dance with a pretty woman. Or the anticipation of a good friend coming to see you.  I wonder how he’s gonna look. I hope he looks like me in the face but I hope he don’t get my hair line. She and I were at the mall earlier and sat next to a lady whose son came out 3 months early. He was now 2 years old. I felt for her. She was really open about her situation and positive. She had a little book she showed us with pictures of him in the hospital. I didn’t get her name but I could tell she was a really strong woman after going through having a kid early. I’m not sure why I actually told you that, but bear with me. Like I said, I’m still really excited and just as much anxious.

   Earlier this week, I had to go get registration for the car and outside the State building, I saw these 2 White guys sitting at what looked like a racist lemonade stand, pushing pamphlets talking about how bad and “hitler like” president Obama is. They even had pictures  of him with a Hitler mustache and crossed eyes. It kind of made me mad but at the same time I had to laugh at them both because they were probably just some volunteers that weren’t getting paid to sit out in that 115 degree heat. I did ask them if they were with a white supremacist group. And I also mentioned that they couldn’t do that anywhere in the city of Detroit and not expect a riot to break out. Living in the south, I’ve noticed how very much different white folks act than they do back home. Here its “power in numbers”. Up there, its, “let me sit my white ass down before these niggas rob me.

   On another note, that Jay-Z and Kanye LP dropped today. I thought it was going to be some of the best music to come out in the last 5 years. And it let me down. There is absolutely NOTHING in hip-hop right now that even remotely sounds good. I hoped they could have changed that. Maybe if i would've spent my 10$ on like regular people then i would appreciate it a bit more......Naaaa....Its a really rushed album. But, im still gonna play it. Maybe it'll grow on me.

 

That’s all for now. Have a good weekend and have some fun for your boy.

Busy living.

Lil Wayne let out a mixtape yesterday called "Sorry for the Wait" and that's how I feel as I'm typing. I AM sorry I haven't been posting. But anyway, My baby is ready to come out. i can tell. The nigga moves ALL night. He makes his mom extra hungry even after she just ate. Nothing's really new. My cousin Chris got married yesterday. I was the cheapest wedding Photog they ever saw too. I took some really good pics. too. I've been working on beats too. For a dude that just started, i'm not too bad. Check it out. Its just a hobby. My cousin says I should try and sell some so I made a lil comercial. I posted it on youtube.
BEATS FOR HIRE

I just wanted to say a lil bit just so you all don't think i abandoned ship. I'm just busy living.

Lets talk music

              There are a lot of new artists trying to make a lane in music right now. I wanted to talk about a few. 1st off there's Freddie Gibbs from Gary, Indiana. This cat is nice. Like really. He grew up in the hood and you can tell from his raps that he ain't trying to go back unless its to visit. I'm talking about HUNGRY. His raps are filled with pain and experiences that only someone from a bad neighborhood can feel. He sounds southern but reps the Midwest HARD. I have his mixtape Str8 Killa No Filla. Its realer than the dirt on your shoes. If you want to check it out here's a torrent link....Freddie Gibbs Mixtape. 


          The next dude I want to speak on is Frank Ocean. Now, he's no Bobby Brown but he gets down. I'm really hard on R&B dudes because most of them today can't sing or they gay acting like they singing to women. But this dude Frank Ocean is official. Well, at least his music is. He puts you in the mind of Ryan Leslie with the way he sets up his songs but his writing sounds original to me. His production is flawless. I have an EP from and here's the link to get it yourself Frank Ocean Ep Nostalgia, Ultra. 


         Elzhi out of Detroit isn't new to me but a lot of people haven't heard about him so I'll put him in the new category. But anyway, He's the most slept-on rapper in the game right now. There are a lot of rappers in Detroit and out of all, he really captures the city. The Dope, The hoes, The hood, The Life. He recently reworked Nas's Illmatic and since that album is held in high regard as a Classic, its hard to rework something like that. But, he killed it. Every song is a good one. Here is a link to check it for yourself. Elzhi-Elmatic He also has another good mixtape called "The Leftovers" The Leftovers. 






Ok well, I'm at work getting paid to blog. Let me get up and get paid to supervise. 
Hope you like the Music. Feedback is cool too you know.

Pops Came to Visit!

         So, remember when I was complaining about no one comming down to Houston to see me? Well, My damn daddy came down here over the weekend. And i had a BLAST. He did too. He rented a COLD ass 300 and we rode all around the H like pure bosses. When i say a good time, i mean a good time. I tried to take him everywhere that i like to go. And he didn't complain or talk no shit. I finally got a chance to host one of my parents. In a nice spot, with food to eat, lights on, all that fly shit. I think he liked Houston but I doubt if he'd want to move here. He said the black folk are really funny acting. Same shit I been saying since I moved here. Coming from a 90 to 80% black city, we looking for some type of comradery. He didn't really feel it. He liked my boo thang. Said she was cool. They spent some time together while I was @ work friday night. I think she liked him too. We always crack jokes about each other's parents so I'm just waiting for her to clown since I always have ammo cause her parents live here. I took a few pictures and I'll post them a bit later.

             That's really all i have to say today. I know I've been really quiet but I'm in grind mode right now. And all I'm thinking about is Work, money, bills, and my baby boy. I have the means to post all the time now so I'll really try to get on here and talk.

Everyone have a good week.
Always remember to think realistically AND positive.



Here are a few pics from the time we spent......

ITS A BOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    
     Tuesday, I found out that I'm having a son. That's right. A little E.Green pt. 2. And I don't know if I have the words in my vocabulary to tell you how happy I am. When we were at the hospital getting the Ultrasound, a flash of my playing catch w/a little boy came through my head. And when the nurse told us, I teared up a bit. The Queen was crying like she had just seen Jesus but that's understandable. This is the all time coolest thing I've ever been apart of. A SON. That's all I keep saying to myself. A SON.

     I'm going to name him Eric Green. I don't know if I should make it Jr. or the 2nd. Guess the queen and I will talk that out. There are so many thoughts in my head about this whole experience. Will he look like me? Will he be athletic? Will be a quiet kid? Will he catch on to things fast? The questions never stop. I'm really excited about it but I also have to be realistic about it too. This world we live in is very downtrodden and I'm going to have to safeguard him from a lot. Raising a child isn't cheap either so I have to figure out what I'm gonna do to make some more money. My mom didn't have a lot to work with raising me so I know how it'll go. She made the best out of the hand she was dealt. That's the same thing I'll have to do too.

         My brother is going to be an uncle. My sister is going to be an aunt. My favorite aunt is going to be a Great aunt. And my parents are going to be grandparents. That is some real shit. My whole mind set is going to change. It has too. My life is dedicated to him and her now. (In that order) E.Green the realist is about to transform into E.Green the FATHER. That is priceless. Most of my adult life I have been searching for happiness. I think this little boy is going to be my true source of happiness.

Let me go and get ready to go home. Thanks for reading my thoughts.

Tuesday is the day

  
   Hey long time no see....

Since my life is oh so uneventful, I haven't had really much to write about. Later on today, I finally get to find out what the sex of my baby is going to be. At 1st I wanted a girl but I'm not tripping either way it goes. As long as it has all its parts and its healthy. That's really all I care about. The Queen and I are on the same page about that. I was talking to my cousin earlier and he asked me if I had any dreams that might give me any clues as to what the sex would be. I had to laugh because in all my dreams, if a kid of mine is around, it has on a all black ninja suit and I can't see its face. That's too funny. My own dreams can't help me out with this one. So, I'll see later today.
What do you think it'll be???

   Saturday, I slept the whole day away AGAIN. Going to sleep @ 11am and not waking up till 8:37pm. To make the best of the night, the Queen and I went to see Thor. It was ok. But they kinda played the love story up more than they cranked up the action.

  Sunday we went and "made groceries". (Southern Term for grocery shopping) and went over her brother's house. Like I said earlier, Uneventful.

Well, Today is tuesday...what are you going to do with the rest of your week?

Just give em' up

  
   Its friday and I had a pretty good week. I can't complain about anything that happened because I still have a job and I still look the same. There IS something that happened at work today that I'd like to speak on though. I work at a University as a Custodial Supervisor. I am the youngest in the department on all shifts. I have prior experience in this field so I know the job and the work. But being younger and I think Darker than mostly everyone in the department, I run into a lot of hostility from others within the department. For example....

     When I get to work, I give out keys to buildings and assignments. Tonight, there were 3 sets of keys missing from the office. These keys were to the building I'm mainly assigned to. Another supervisor told me that the keys were being used by the afternoon shift because they were cleaning up after a graduation earlier in the day. He also said that he'd go and get the keys and bring them to me. So, since he always takes his sweet time to do things, I went to the building to get the keys myself. And let me add that the building is adjacent to my own across a parking lot.

     When I got to the building, I sought out what looked like a supervisor, identified myself and stated that I was there to get the keys to the athletics building. The guy looked at me crazy and refused to give me the keys. Again, I told him who I was and said that I had people waiting to start their work. He said, "I'll give the keys to who I got them from and they'll give them to you". Huh? So I call the other supervisor I share an office with and tell him what's going on. He asks me to put the guy on the phone and at 1st he didn't want to talk to him. Then he snatches the phone and they start talking. I hear the guy say, "well I don't even know him". But I'm in uniform AND I told you who I was.

          He walks towards three other people and starts talking some spanish and tells the guy that lied to me a few weeks ago, Ernesto to give me the keys.

      Now, maybe I'm being a bitch about it, maybe I'm offended. BUT, I know if I was white, OR if I came up in there talking Spanish, I'd have got those keys and been on my merry way. BUT, since I AM young, and a Black man, the 1st thing that comes into their heads is "he's on some bullshit". Not Cool. I don't use broken english, I don't sag my pants, I don't have gold teeth. Someone can look at me and tell that I'm not an ignorant guy. But, since the world thinks that all black men are stupid monkey's, this guy had his mind made up about me before I opened my mouth.

I got the keys though. And I emailed my department director about the situation. For the 1st time, I snitched.

Her 1st Mom's Day

  
      I had the best sunday that I've had in month's. Earlier last week I was really down and out about not being able to spend my mom on Mother's day. But by thursday, it finally dawned on me that I have a new mother in my own home! So sunday night, I called the Queen's mom, brother, and sister and invited them over for an "Inaugural Mother's Day Bbq" and guess what? THEY ALL SHOWED!!! They really showed me. Because I'm gonna be honest, I didn't think they gave a fuck about us having a baby. So I stand corrected. Any differences they had between themselves, they kept that shit to themselves for the sake of their little sister. And I can't tell you how much I appreciated that.

          We grilled up chicken, burgers, steak, and baked potatoes. We all sat down and ate. Then took a dip in the pool. The Queen was so happy! And I was even happier because I finally got to see her smile at something other than Meet the Browns. All in all, it was a real nice day. I'm a bit dry on the words today so I'll ride out from here.


You have a great week and try not to sweat the small stuff. Catch you later

They made us hate ourself and love they Wealth

  .    I had a conversation with the Queen's uncle about a month ago that had and has me thinking. He believes that the Civil Rights movement hurt Blacks instead of helping us. His view was that in the Jim Crow days, whites told Blacks that, "we don't want you here". And what did we do? We created our own communities. With Black stores, Black restaurants, Black movie theaters that showed Black movies there were even Black Doctors and Dentist offices. But like the Kanye West verse says, "They made hate ourselves and love their Wealth" and we wanted to be equal.

    But we weren't made equals. Because even though after Civil Rights Movement paved the way for equality, we were (and still are) still being given the short end of the stick. After thinking over and over on his theory, I can believe it. Black folks have NOTHING but some fancy clothes, cars with rims, and the houses they live in. Where is the equality? Where is the wealth that the whites have? The same wealth that our forefathers died for building this country? Are we spending it on Polo shirts and gold and platinum jewelry? What wealth are we passing down to our future generations?

        When I look at the degradation of our society, I notice how it has effected my own community. 20 years ago there were shows that showcased the Black family in a good light. Shows like Family Matters, The Cosby Show, A Different World, Rock, Sister Sister, Thea, Teen Summit. These shows were staples in Black households that addressed many issues that arose in day to day life of a Black family. Now days all kids have to watch is 16 and pregnant. Or 106 & Park. Where negative images are displayed ALL DAY.

      Somewhere down the line we (Black folk) dropped the ball and traded it for a platinum chain. Our youth is clueless as to how the world really is and how they are viewed. The average 15 to 21 year old inner-city Black youth's mentality has been shaped to only be out for self. Only out to get money like the entertainers and sports figures they see on T.V. There is no oneness anymore. No camaraderie. "Fuck you, Pay Me" is the attitude now. But who is to blame?

     Well, I blame our own selves. WE were the ones that wanted equality. WE were the ones that wanted to live in white neighborhoods. But when we moved in, no one told us about the racial profiling that came with it. No one told us of all the stipulations that came with just being equal. Some body should have told Martin Luther King to sit down and shut the fuck up back in the 50's. If they did, I don't think our race would be in such a shambles. We would have a proud race. A race of Kings and Queens that actually had something other than a nice outfit and gaudy jewelry. We need to change the deadly pattern of thinking and living that we have succumb to. But I really don't have the answers. I can only teach my own kid to think and live different. That's where it starts. In our homes. We as parents as adults need to pass more along to the next generation than monetary gifts. We need to pass along a better way of thinking to our own kids and youth we come in contact with. Its actually 5:40am and I'm at work so if my thoughts are running a little its because I'm tired and ready to go home. Sorry.

This is just my view on things. If you have a different one, there's the comment box.

Congratulations!!!!

  

          

          I almost forgot.....

I want to send a special Congratulations to my cousin Jason Green. Over the weekend he became nationally ranked at the NAGA trials in Chicago, Ill. Its a real big deal to me because when we were kids, I used to beat his ass and now, he's talking about how he had to drop weight to 195. And with me being a measly 150lbs., that's the shit to me. And moreover, I don't know nobody nationally ranked in nothing but robbery. Here's a link to the NAGA website so you can check it out yourself. Congrats cuz!

http://www.nagafighter.com/index.php?module=eventdetailpage/189

Be Realistic with yourself

  

         I like to think realistically about the situations I find myself in and the situations of others that I encounter. And sometimes, that realistic view can offend others or irritate myself. I've been living in Houston almost 3 years now and the only time I've seen my family is when I've went back to Detroit myself to visit. I have heard talk of coming down to visit but only one no, two have actually come. My realistic view on this is that I'll NEVER see any of them again. That's my mom, sister, brother, father, aunts, uncles, and cousins.

        I don't see that view as a negative one. I see it as truth. My father retired sometime last year and I know he had got on a plane and went somewhere since then. But not to Houston. This IS very depressing. But you can't let something like that hold you back. Well, I try not too. My moods are up and down. I could be feeling good about a situation and my day could be going swell. And then, I'll get home, have a talk with my mother and feel bad as hell. And its not from anything we talked about, its because I can't see her beautiful smile. Same goes for my father. My brother and myself would go over his house every sunday and kick it. Now almost every sunday, I'm sitting on the couch depressed.

        But, I say once again, you can't situations like that hold you back from living and enjoying life. I'm starting my own family so it kind of takes the weight off the situation. But not really. Because my kid will only be around one set of grandparents. He/she won't be able to know my parents, siblings, and other family like I'd want it too. Its really fucked up but I chose this life and that's what it is. I have to be real with myself and the situation I'm in.

         The Queen is younger than me. She was born and raised in Houston, Texas. I, as you know was born in Detroit, Michigan. Two totally different worlds. She was raised in a dual parent home. I was raised in a single parent home. So just from those few facts you can glean that we have totally different ways of thinking. And we have a LOT of heated back and forth dialogue due to those factors. My realistic view on this situation is that after a while, she AND myself will realize that we can learn from each other. I think that when I tell her things, she takes it as a "brow-beating". When I'm really trying to put her up on game because I have a bit more experience at this thing we call life. When she tries to tell me things, I have to realize that she has a different view on things due to upbringing and lack of experience. That's just how it is. You have to adjust and roll on from there.

That's all I have for now. Its Sunday so I want you all to have a Great week.

"The lying bastard!"

           As this work weeks comes to a close, I look back on the week as a whole and I see it as a pretty good one. I finally got another person in my building at work so now I can really supervise. The lady they sent, is a VERY good worker. She's a slim, older hispanic woman with a pretty smile. Her smile gives a glimpse into her younger days where she was probably finer than hair on a snake. Her english isn't top notch but she speaks "work" and "detail" so I'm not trippin. 

     One work situation that does stick out in my mind happened on wendsday morning. A sports trainer was getting ready to go with a team on a road trip and he had asked me to open a door for him. I didn't have the key to the door so I asked the guy that works days if he had a key. He looked @ me and simply said "NO, ju people pose' to hab a key". (He has a heavy accent) So I walked away heading downstairs to tell the trainer that I couldn't open the door. When I got downstairs, I saw the day man open the door for the trainer. I instantly became incensed with anger. The Lying bastard! 

         So you know I checked off into his lying ass. I asked him why he lied to my face. He started to act like he didn't understand english making me even more mad because I had just saw him talking extensively to the trainer. But, I kept my cool and explained to him that lying has NO place in my building and that we were all on the same team, and are there for just one thing. He acted like he was mad I checked him. He probably was but being real, I couldn't give a "extra special fuck" how he felt about it.

        Other than that, I had a good week. Its friday 6:29pm. So after tonight I'm off till monday. The Queen and I are about to meet her family @ a restaurant to celebrate her parents 36th wedding anniversary. Wow 36 years! I hope she and I can make it 36 months let alone 36 years. Only time will tell on that one. 

Well, have a great weekend and I'll catch you later. 

            

28 is GREAT!

        

             Well, I'm finally the BIG 28! It was a long bumpy road to get here. And what's funny is that the bumps aren't even half way over. I can remember having a hard time with life when I was in my early 20's and thinking that the closer I got to 30, it would get easier. Well I know some 30 year olds that beg to differ. So knowing their plight and my own, I would be totally wrong to "Expect" things to just turn around and get better. But, I don't. I do on the other hand expect Myself to effect changes and MAKE things better.

          I had a pretty good birthday weekend. It was a "broke-ass" birthday but with the money I did have, I went and got meat to bbq, some good medicine, and went to my apartment complex's pool and the queen and I pitched up a party. I wasn't at a 5 star restaurant with servers clapping and singing happy birthday. Or at a club with a hand full of dollar bills. I was at home, bbq-ing with my woman chilling at the pool. On some realness, I wouldn't trade that for anything. It was REALLY fun.

          Due to my upbringing, I never got to celebrate my birthday until I was old enough to go out and hangout myself. And I always had these high expectations on how a birthday should be. Well, I was very wrong. I don't need to do anything extravagant. It was more fun sitting pool side and eating "E.Green's world class bbq" than being up in somebody's loud club looking at all the drunk folk. I feel like I rang my 28th year in with a loud sonic BANG. You should have seen the bossy look on my face the whole time we were out there. You would have thought I was on an island resort.


 I say all that to say this, be happy with you DO have and what you CAN do.



How was your weekend?

And We're still waiting....

             Well, in 3 days I'll be 28 years old. Yes, E.Green the realist blogger alive is knocking on 30. But this is no mid life crisis or anxious event. I'm happy to see another year. After the last year I had, I should really go out and do some Rick James partying. But, I'm gonna find some good medicine, medicate myself, and plop right down in the bed. I had made plans to go to Dallas to see my cousin but when you plan things, there is always a monkey wrench. So, I'll have to postpone my lil getaway for a few weeks.

        I had a few words of wisdom for the week but I kinda forgot what I was going to say. I wanted to stir up some attitudes and feelings over the choke-hold that the present day gas prices have on the nation. I can't believe people aren't in the streets protesting and boycotting gas stations. But on the other hand, I think the age of the Rebel is far gone. Our society has gotten SO lazy that we get mad and rant and rave on Twitter and Facebook but don't open our mouths to say a word. So unless someone (more than one) gets fed up with paying 40$ at a time at a gas pump and only getting a half tank, there will be no change.

          I'm not promoting a national sit-in or protest. But I AM asking people to be more proactive and be realistic with what's going on in the country. I personally have a problem with paying 4.50 a gallon for gas. I even have a problem paying a dollar for air to put in my tires. There is a major greed problem in the country and US as poor and middle class people aren't getting our cut. And that's not right.

     I don't have the answers to the problems we face now and in the future, but I do know we need to get off our asses and demand change. Demand a fair life where everyone that tries receives something for their effort. I grew up being told that the Almighty God would soon step in and change the World for the better. Well, this would be a great time for that........

And We're still waiting.

      
"Take it from me, someday, we'll ALL be free"-Donny Hathaway.

        

That is all today

           I can't remember the last time I had a worse sunday than yesterday. That's all for me today. I'll try and get some type of inspiration so I can write more. But for now. That's what it is. Words do hurt. Especially when they come from somebody talking about they love you.

Everybody have a great day.
Think before you speak.

The Help has quit

                 In my few years of life, I have come to realize that I try and help too much. But MY help is defined as imposing my thoughts and opinions on the person I'm trying to help. And then, I get mad when they don't want to do it my way. I can see that as being one of my flaws. But how do I work on this behavior? Or how can I curb it?

         A few weeks ago, I was talking to a good friend of mine who is married. He and his wife have been married going on 8 years. They have 2 well-mannered kids, a nice home, and a dog. American Dream right? But there is a flip side to it. Their sex life totally sucks. So when he and I talk, all he really talks about is how his wife won't do this or do that. And how he wishes he could meet another, younger, freakier, (is "freakier" a word?) woman. So that conversation a few weeks ago was just like the last 10 we had.

        My friend flipped the script on me on this last conversation though. He told me that he had met a younger, freakier woman working at the Best Buy he frequents. And that he and she had been fucking for the last 4 months. (Since the last time we talked) Automatically, my "help" switch popped on and I started to talk some sense into him. He wasn't trying to hear a word of it either. So, I got really irritated.

       I had to come to the realization that you just can't tell some people shit. You can talk, counsel, talk, and plead with a person until you run out of breath. But at the end of it all, its their situation. And if somehow in their head they have rationalized it, no matter HOW wrong or stupid they may sound, you're better off leaving it alone and letting them do them. It may suck having to see a friend or loved one go down a bad path but it is what it is. Don't stress yourself over a hard headed person. Cause THEY are going to have to deal with the outcome......NOT YOU.

Have a greater day than yesterday! Catch you later.    

"I could've easily put her in the headlock".

        
      I can't put on airs or front like having a baby isn't the coolest thing I've ever been a part of. And I can't front at the same time that dealing with a pregnant woman is fun OR easy. Because its no beach party. In these last 3 months I can't put a number on the times I've been cussed out, disrespected, and had my feelings destroyed. An angry woman will dig as deep into you as a BP drill in the ocean floor.

   Sometimes I try and figure out what I did or am doing to get her going. But I can't. Well, I'm lying. I know what it is but I don't think its SO big that it warrants a cuss out. Or a day long attitude. I've been told that a woman's emotions and hormones are all out of wack when she's pregnant. When I heard that, I thought they were talking about crying after UNICEF commercials. Or just crying a lot. Guess who was extra wrong?....

    These last few months have taught me valuable lessons about communication, humility, and outright self-control. There have been many instances where I could have easily put her in the head lock and just fell on the floor. But my self-control held me back like a best friend stopping you from fighting. I'm not going to say its easy either because its not. Its actually very hard to have self-control. But that power comes with maturity. Not age, but maturity. I know a lot of 40 year old dudes that don't have a inkling of self-control.

     Communication also has helped me. A lot. I use to feel bad if I couldn't cover a bill and would hold it in until I got the money to pay it. Just yesterday, I came up short and I called The Queen, told her the situation, and she was cool about it. Blew my fucking mind! I was holding the phone cringing after telling her cause I KNEW that she'd act a fool. But she didn't. That really made me feel great.

     Humility comes into play when we talk about feelings I may have about the things she may do or say when she's angry. I talk to her with tact. I don't scream, I cuss but I don't call her out her name. I HUMBLE myself. I use my calm, "after this talk we fuckin" voice. I think it works. Sometimes.

I use all those qualities or Powers as I like to call them, to keep our relationship going. Things my parents couldn't do. Some people say that being in a single parent home is bad for a kid. Well, it was. But, I have a perfect example of what NOT to do. Thanks mom! Thanks dad!

   Everybody have a GREAT week. And I'll catch up later.

Damn where did the day go?

              The Queen and I went to see a movie last night. We saw HANNA. I'm 50/50 on Hanna right now. It would need a sequel for me to really like it. It put me in the mind of Kill Bill but with a younger female and way less story. The movie was good but it lacked story and needed more action.

    We had to catch a late show because I slept the WHOLE saturday away. I wish I could at least have slept 4 of 5 hours and got up but it just didn't work out like that. When I finally woke up, it was 8pm. I'm getting use to being up all night not but I'm not getting use to being sleep all day and losing time to do stuff. I'm really suprised I didn't fall asleep in the movie.

When we got home I sat up till 4am all by myself. Working Midnights has really turned my life upside down. And its only gonna get worse when the baby come. I hope it let me sleep. My Saturday wasn't really fun filled. My only highlight was seeing my people for about 45min and going to see Hanna.

As you can probably read and see, I have a pretty boring life. Work, Sleep, Work, Sleep. I should change the blog name to E.GreensBoringLife.

Get Your People Skills Up!

         While I have some free moments I'll tell you about being a people person and the advantages of being that. I grew up Jehovah's Witness and being apart of that, I had to go from door to door and spread God's word. My Grandfather and I would sometimes stand outside of liquor stores and preach to the wino's, bums, crack heads, and anyone else going or coming. It was a really positive experience in my opinion. Taking part in that work made gave me the power of approaching people and starting conversations.  

At my earliest age, I had to have been 7 or 8 when I really started to come into my own with it. A lady was taking groceries from her car and she stopped and rubbed her back in pain. I went to her and said, "lady, I bet I know a way that your back will never hurt again..." That question sparked off a conversation that I had to let my granddad finish off. 

I feel that being a people person takes social wit and skill. You have to have been around ALL types of people to know how people think. To read body language to see the mood their in. I would say that you need a good vocabulary but if Lil Wayne can do an interview on Prime time with Katie Couric, and the next day someone says he speaks well, maybe not. Regardless of who or what, being a people person takes a good mouthpiece. 

I feel as though I have good talking skills. My father is a slick talker. Maybe that's where I get it from. I call 2 of the ladies in my building at work, my 2 wives and they just eat it up. I talk to them about their kids, interests, music, and anything else I hear them talk about. Those conversations go really far. They work HARD and don't complain. That's a Win on my part as far as I'm concerned. 

Even though these entries are my thoughts, I don't want to ramble on and on like my literal thoughts. So I'll wrap it up by saying this to whoever may pass through here, "Get Your People Skills Up!". #thatisall

i didnt know these guys. my people skills got me a picture with the burger king and g.i joe here.

        

"I had more women in a week than he had seen in a Month!"

              

           In 2006 I was laid-off from the Detroit Board Of Education. Other than having a child, I think that was the best thing that ever happened to me. After the lay-off I started down a treacherous road. I stole, I cheated people, I got super lazy, and I sold a LOT of drugs. And used them too. I started to sleep with a lot of different women. Women that were out for the wrong things. Not my heart.

I'll never forget the turning point where I had to wake up out the negative, deadly stupor of a life I was living. It was my father putting me out on the street. When I reflect I can see the pain on his face while telling me I had to go. We had missed out on a lot of time together and finally we started to come together, he had to put me out.

I totally understand why he did it. I was selling weed and sleeping with WAY more women in a week than he'd seen in a month. IN HIS HOUSE. Soon after that, I stayed at a cousin's house that sold even more drugs and had even more women than me. Obviously not a good move. After a few weeks there, my dope money dried up and those fast women found another dope boy to buy them drinks and sleep around with.

I thought and pondered over how I could get my life together. And I came up with moving to Houston. My cousin had called me and told me to come and try something new. That call was life changing also. It gave me a new reality. A new goal to reach. I tucked my tail and moved back home with my mom soon after that call. I saved my M.A.R.V.I.N checks up and skipped town.

Since the move, I've still had ups and downs. But I've learned to always get better from every bad experience. And to always remember that as long as you try you will have some type of success. #thatisall  

How will my baby turn out?

      
   Earlier today I was thinking about how good or bad of a father I would be. All of my thoughts were totally positive except one... The thought of me putting my all into shaping this child's persona and he/she going the exact opposite like kind of how I did with my parents. My parents weren't married and they tried to have a relationship a few times in my early youth. Even though they weren't married, they both supported each other in the teaching and shaping of the Man I am today.

   As I reflect, I feel like I had a very good upbringing. My mother was a hard working christian whom I spent most of my time with giving me the great work ethic that I have. She was strong willed and stood up for what was right. Even if she was the only one standing. She was a teacher and took out the time to actually show me how things were. Giving me understanding of things and situations at a young age.

My father on the other hand was a slick talking, witty, hard working, blue collar type of guy. He was fair in matters with people. He was a avid music lover, exposing me to various genres. The qualities that both parents displayed in my upbringing made me the man I am today.

I wonder what qualities I will pass down to my child. Will it love basketball like I do? Will it be able to judge a person's character fairly like I do? Will it be a hard worker like me? Will it be respectful of others like me? Will it be funny like me?

All these questions and more have been running through my head since the day I found out my woman was pregnant. I wouldn't call these questions stressful questions though. I call them "cautionary questions". They will be answered soon enough. And when he/she reads this, it will hopefully make the right decision to be an upstanding citizen, a superb African American, and a really funny person.

How was your day today?

My Biggest, Nastiest, Deadly Habit....

  
   I have a few problems. Some of them are really small. Some of them are big enough to make a weaker person kill himself. But, the biggest problem I have is killing me slowly. Its Cigarettes. At one time in my life, I HATED cigarettes. As a child, I can remember leaving a Detroit Tigers baseball game holding my dad's hand and being burned on my arm by a man's cigarette walking past us. An experience like that would make ANYONE not ever want to pick up a habit like smoking. But, then again I'm not just anyone....

I'm not a heavy, every 30 min. smoker. I might smoke 1 pack every 3 days. But I'm still smoking. My teeth are ugly. My breath stinks. My hands smell like them. My woman hates that I smoke. But being the superwoman that she is, she toughs it out and doesn't give me grief about it. I do plan to kick the habit. I have tried before and the longest I've went was 2 weeks. 10 whole days without a cigarette. Now, I can't go 10 hours.

I believe that bad habits can be dropped like weight on Worlds Biggest Loser. Its just about self control. Mind over matter. There has to be a want to stop. I'm getting to have a child and I think that's a good enough reason to do so. I'll never forget being in Drafting class 1st hour at Davis Aerospace and smelling Brandon Pritchet. His parents smoked cigarettes in the car on the way to drop him off everyday. Smelling him, you would've thought he worked nights at a bar somewhere. I don't want to subject my kid to that. And I don't want to be out of breath when its time to run through the meadow. Or play hide and go seek.

So today I vow to kick the cigarette habit. I give myself until October 1st. I'll keep you guys and gals posted on how its going.

Have a greater day than yesterday. Catch you later.

  

I really don't know what to start this 2nd entry off with. Right now its 2:14am, I'm at work, and a tad bit irritated. Not because the work is hard. Not because I don't want to be here. But because I feel as though my direct superior lacks backbone. *This is just an opinion* Every night, before we go to our individual buildings, we have a supervisor's meeting. In this meeting, we discuss the events of the night, absentee's, complaints from the earlier shift, and other misc. things.

I just started working at this job about 4 weeks ago. And my building has not gotten 1 single complaint since my 1st day on the job. *Pat myself on the back* But tonight, I got a work request to wipe some windows down. And on the work order it specified that the windows had not been cleaned since Dec. 2010. I wasn't working here then. My problem with that is, WHY DOSEN'T THE DAY SHIFT TAKE CARE OF IT?

Here is where my manager comes into play....anytime I ask him about the daily upkeep in my building during the day shift, he gets "mumble-mouthed" on me. Or he says, "well, that's how it is." Totally unacceptable. Light cleaning and upkeep is to be done during the day and Heavy detailed cleaning is to be done at night. When I ask my manager to talk to the Day manager about it, he acts scary as if he's going up against a fire breathing dragon. Like if he asks for something fair, he'll be treated unfairly. I was always taught to stand up for what's right. Even if I'm the only one standing.

I'll end with this, A man with no backbone isn't considered a man. To me....

First time here....

Hello I'm Eric. I'm starting this blog to share my ideas and opinions with whoever may care to listen. Also, wanted to somehow chronicle my life and experiences for my unborn baby whom I'm really hoping is a girl. I'll know what it is really soon. I'm really nervous about having bby but 'Im also VERY excited. Its finally my turn t be a father. that's BIG shit to me.

I'm going to go a head and wrap this on up. thank you very much for taking the time to read my Blog. I promise you that you won't be dissapointed.