"I could've easily put her in the headlock".

        
      I can't put on airs or front like having a baby isn't the coolest thing I've ever been a part of. And I can't front at the same time that dealing with a pregnant woman is fun OR easy. Because its no beach party. In these last 3 months I can't put a number on the times I've been cussed out, disrespected, and had my feelings destroyed. An angry woman will dig as deep into you as a BP drill in the ocean floor.

   Sometimes I try and figure out what I did or am doing to get her going. But I can't. Well, I'm lying. I know what it is but I don't think its SO big that it warrants a cuss out. Or a day long attitude. I've been told that a woman's emotions and hormones are all out of wack when she's pregnant. When I heard that, I thought they were talking about crying after UNICEF commercials. Or just crying a lot. Guess who was extra wrong?....

    These last few months have taught me valuable lessons about communication, humility, and outright self-control. There have been many instances where I could have easily put her in the head lock and just fell on the floor. But my self-control held me back like a best friend stopping you from fighting. I'm not going to say its easy either because its not. Its actually very hard to have self-control. But that power comes with maturity. Not age, but maturity. I know a lot of 40 year old dudes that don't have a inkling of self-control.

     Communication also has helped me. A lot. I use to feel bad if I couldn't cover a bill and would hold it in until I got the money to pay it. Just yesterday, I came up short and I called The Queen, told her the situation, and she was cool about it. Blew my fucking mind! I was holding the phone cringing after telling her cause I KNEW that she'd act a fool. But she didn't. That really made me feel great.

     Humility comes into play when we talk about feelings I may have about the things she may do or say when she's angry. I talk to her with tact. I don't scream, I cuss but I don't call her out her name. I HUMBLE myself. I use my calm, "after this talk we fuckin" voice. I think it works. Sometimes.

I use all those qualities or Powers as I like to call them, to keep our relationship going. Things my parents couldn't do. Some people say that being in a single parent home is bad for a kid. Well, it was. But, I have a perfect example of what NOT to do. Thanks mom! Thanks dad!

   Everybody have a GREAT week. And I'll catch up later.